Cry me a liver!: Shhhh….

I have a secret.

And I’m not gonna tell.

LATEST RIDICULOUS ARGUMENT BETWEEN SARA & *INSERT NAME HERE*

Sara: Ok, can we all sit up and have a family prayer?

Benjamin: Okayyyyyyyyyyy

*we all sit up and are on my bed*

Lauren: Lily scoot over, I want to be in a circle.

Sara: No, she’s fine.

Lauren: But I want a circle! We’re a trapezoid.

Benjamin: No, we’re a pentagon.

Lauren: Trapezoid

Benjamin: Pentagon. *pointing at each of us* 1, 2, 3, 4, 5. Pentagon.

Sara: You’re seriously arguing with her???

Lauren: Trapezoid

Benjamin: Yes, because it’s a pentagon

Kathryn: Can I go downstairs and take some Tylenol and then come back up?

Sara: NO. Lauren, Benjamin, can we please pray?? Lauren, will you say the prayer? Whoops, she said the dinner prayer. Benjamin, you get to pray since you’re arguing with a child.

*prayer is said*

Lauren: TRAPAZOID

Benjamin: Pentagon. It has 5 sides.

Lauren: Mom, are you going to post this as your ridiculous argument?

Benjamin: NO

Sara: YES *proceeds to come downstairs to type it up*

I can still hear them arguing about what shape it is.

My Fav kid sayings:

Grandma: Erik, you know mother's day is on Sunday?
Erik: Yes, grandma, I know! I made this really cool project for my mama. She's going to love it. I also colored a poem for her too.
Grandma: Erik, did you make me anything for mother's day?
Erik: You're Matthew's mother. He can worry about you.
haha!!

Karl: Look! My gingerbread house is a condo!
(Yes, we eat, breathe and sleep condos)

Kathryn: Mom, you said you were coming to bed a long time ago.
Mom: Yes, but I got distracted looking at matching dresses for you and Lily for Christmas.
Kathryn: Really?
Mom: Really. You don't mind if you match do you?
Kathryn: Hellllllooooo. I'm not a normal kid. I LIKE vegetables. Of course I don't mind if we match *sigh*

Lauren: Mom, do you have any medication for dizziness?
Mom: Yes, I do.
Lauren: Can I have some?
Mom: Sure. It's called going to bed.
Lauren: Moooooooooooooooooom *sigh*

Auntie Sara: Karl, you need to get into your pajamas. I hope you brought some warm ones. I don't want you getting cold tonight in the tent.
Karl: Auntie, I think I'm part machine. I like sleeping in the cold. I don't like to over-heat.

Grandpa: Erik, will you take Kjelly's diaper to the garbage and put his wipes away?
Erik: Grandpa, I'm not your lackey.
*1 hour later*
Erik: Grandpa, I'm hungry, what are you going to make me for dinner?
Grandpa: Erik, I'm not your lackey.

Kathryn: Mom, I'm under strain.
Mom: You're under what?
Kathryn: Strain Mom, I'm under strain. I have 6 minutes to take a test on Thursday for the excel program.
Mom: Oh! You mean you're under stress!
Kathryn: Yeah... stress. Mom? What's strain?

Lauren: In the bathroom with the door closed while bathing Lily "I can just feel the humidity rising in here. It must be at 80% already!" I just know she's going to be our little scientist.

Kathryn: bursting into my mother's bedroom "Oh, my poor sick little boy" (Erik) "He just threw up everywhere! And I? I had to witness this tragedy."

Mom: Kissing Kathryn good-bye, "Be good for Grandma and Grandpa."
Kathryn: "OK, I'll try to not get on Grandma's evil side."

Lauren: "Oh, just looking at that makes my butt tingle!" (She had just looked at a bruise on Kathryn's thigh)

Kathryn: Is the real name of our butts called the buttocks?
Dad: No, the real name of your butt is called the Gluteus Maximus.
Kathryn: Cool! That sounds like a Harry Potter Spell!

Grandma: "I'm going to beat your butt!"
Lauren: "But my butt is sacred!"

Erik: Looking at me incredulous "Kathryn has to stay! I can't take care of two babies all by myself!" I had gone over to Jeri's to pick up Karl and take him to scouts and the girls had Achievements and I was leaving Lily with Jeri.

Cry me a liver!

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Friday, May 7, 2010

Shhhh….

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Things I thought I would never say to my children